well i guess now is a better time than any to spend time with people i miss.
i want to travel, some. i want to re-meet them all. i'm so sorry for being a prick who calls you one of my closest friends, but doesn't even talk to you at school. trust me i beat myself up about it so much i get inner bruises. i know i'm shitty friend, forgive me though, i'm trying.
and i won't mind if i come to you and you walk away from me because i understand if i don't fit in with you anymore. i know i seem like i've changed and i hate it as much as you do but i promise i'm still me. i'm STILL joyeeta. i do doubt it sometimes as much as i suppose you do, but sometimes i feel like there's nowhere else i'd rather be, but nowhere more resricted than where you are. i see them looking, sometimes disliking.
i'm hoping that if the three people who this is directed at were to read this, they'll forgive me a little. because i'm a jerk i'm sorry.
and i'm going to travel.
happiertobeyou
navigate using the bars above ♥
L I S T E N
blogs do NOT equal angsty emo rants.
come on and lift me up its a brand new day
open up a little happiness today
so i can be someone new
come on and lift me up to a better wa)
open up a smile on another face
so i can feel something new
V I D E O
watch this space
well, you're standing next to me.
P R O F I L E
happier being you. ok being me :)
hey, i'm known as joyeeta, joy, jo. whatever 'tickles your fancy'. i love my music. that's a lie. my music is horrible. i like other peoples music. that's true. as for tv; house. little britain, scrubs. two and a half men. too many movies to list all of them, but the dark knight. wall-e. moulin rouge. juno. edward scissorhands. little miss sunshine. nightmare before christmas. are a few. i really won't even try to list the music. too much music. i don't want to vomit up too much information incase there's some crazy stalkers out there. i'm looking at you crazy stalker.
♥
F O U R T E E N
things on my to do list.
things on my to do list.
why not
ONE
♥
T W E E T
C B O X
i think you have to refresh the whole page to see new posts. because it's gay, that's why.
the thoughts that give me the creeps.
11:23 pm - Wednesday, February 25
everything comes down to poo.
7:08 pm - Tuesday, February 24
look what they're doing to me
trying to trip me up
trying to wear me down
honey, I swear, it's so hard to bear it
and I'd never make it through without you around
sometimes I catch myself staring into space
counting down the hours 'til I get to see your face
i'm shouting and i'm screaming,
there's nothing i can do if you can't hear me.
they can tell me what to do
but they can't tell me what to feel
taggerered by kal (L)
RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4.Tag your friends
5.Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!
How Would You Describe Yourself ?
calm your nervous heart - rhett miller
What Do You Like In A Guy/Girl
dreaming out loud - onerepublic
How Do You Feel Today?
can't stop - maroon 5
What Is Your Life Purpose?
menya zovut shnur - leningrad
[ i don't even know what that means. ]
What's Your Motto?
shine on - the kooks
What Do Your Friends Think Of You?
i' m going slightly mad - queen
[ ho hum ]
What Do Your Parents Think Of You ?
build god, then we'll talk - panic at the disco
What Do You Think About Very Often ?
magic - ben kweller
What Is Two Plus Two?
pork and beans - weezer
What Do You Think Of Your Best Friend ?
ur so gay - katy perry
What Is Your Life Story
walk alone - jack johnson
[ aw ]
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up ?
maestro - kaizers orchestra
What Do You Think When You See The Person You Like
a piece of your heart - my name for your name
What Will You Dance To At Your Wedding?
breaking free - high school musical
What Will They Play At Your Funeral ?
epilogue (relief) - apocalyptica
What Is Your Hobby/Interest?
america's suitehearts (acoustic) - fall out boy
What Is Your Biggest Fear?
this heart attack - faker
What Is Your Biggest Secret?
down to the sea - the little mermaid II soundtrack
What Do You Want Right Now?
just a song about ping pong - operator please
What Do You Think Of Your Friends?
look after you - the fray
When You Want to Rush To The Toilet, What Do You Think ?
hips don't lie - shakira
[hahahahahaha]
What Will You Post This As?
everything comes down to poo - scrubs the musical
footnote -
these people are done-
chris
virginia
trying to trip me up
trying to wear me down
honey, I swear, it's so hard to bear it
and I'd never make it through without you around
sometimes I catch myself staring into space
counting down the hours 'til I get to see your face
i'm shouting and i'm screaming,
there's nothing i can do if you can't hear me.
they can tell me what to do
but they can't tell me what to feel
taggerered by kal (L)
RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4.
5.
6. Have Fun!
How Would You Describe Yourself ?
calm your nervous heart - rhett miller
What Do You Like In A Guy/Girl
dreaming out loud - onerepublic
How Do You Feel Today?
can't stop - maroon 5
What Is Your Life Purpose?
menya zovut shnur - leningrad
[ i don't even know what that means. ]
What's Your Motto?
shine on - the kooks
What Do Your Friends Think Of You?
i' m going slightly mad - queen
[ ho hum ]
What Do Your Parents Think Of You ?
build god, then we'll talk - panic at the disco
What Do You Think About Very Often ?
magic - ben kweller
What Is Two Plus Two?
pork and beans - weezer
What Do You Think Of Your Best Friend ?
ur so gay - katy perry
What Is Your Life Story
walk alone - jack johnson
[ aw ]
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up ?
maestro - kaizers orchestra
What Do You Think When You See The Person You Like
a piece of your heart - my name for your name
What Will You Dance To At Your Wedding?
breaking free - high school musical
What Will They Play At Your Funeral ?
epilogue (relief) - apocalyptica
What Is Your Hobby/Interest?
america's suitehearts (acoustic) - fall out boy
What Is Your Biggest Fear?
this heart attack - faker
What Is Your Biggest Secret?
down to the sea - the little mermaid II soundtrack
What Do You Want Right Now?
just a song about ping pong - operator please
What Do You Think Of Your Friends?
look after you - the fray
When You Want to Rush To The Toilet, What Do You Think ?
hips don't lie - shakira
[hahahahahaha]
What Will You Post This As?
everything comes down to poo - scrubs the musical
footnote -
these people are done-
chris
virginia
25 things that don't matter.
8:58 pm - Sunday, February 22
Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you. the only people i'm tagging are the people who read my blog and have their own blogs. yes, i'm looking at you [chrisgracevirginiajude] I'm simply writing this because i've already been tagged twice and dislike posting stupid things on facebook. Blogspot however, is the perfect place to post pointless things that won't mean anything, ever . so here we go *jokervoice*.
o. well, since i just mentioned it, i'm obsessed with the dark knight. i have a joker bobblehead *bobbles*
t. i can be the manliest of men if i want to be. but usually i'm just a weak little wuss.
t. i love my dog. but i'm not great at doing the whole dog pampering thing. he's a pretty dirty dog. he likes to roll in dirt.
f. i have little moments where i look in the mirror and decide i'm decently pretty. then later on i pass another mirror and feel stupid for ever thinking that.
f. my favourite thing o nthe internet is StumbleUpon. I'm an addict.
s. my parents raised me well. but sometimes i feel like i'm not allowed to do anything on my own. and i know you'll oppose me with ' but you're allowed to go to concerts, go on planes by yourself '. but i can't do simple things like go for walks. And everything i do has to be planned and i have to give notice and i have to give a good reason.
s. i'm OBSESSED with girly, happy songs. i'm hoping it's just a phase.
e. i have a pretty dirty mind, apparently.
n. i use herbal essences shampoo/conditioner. the birght pink one. straight something.
t. i like black and white photography, but i suck at it.
e. i pass time by looking at my walls. brings back random memories. you'll understand if you've seen it.
t. the idea of death doesn't scare me, as long as it's death by something cool. like death by black hole, or death by meteor, or death by getting lodged between a truck and a train that carries coal.
t. i give in to bribery.
f. i'm the most annoying person i know.
s. i try my best to buy dc's and dvd's if i'm a big enough fan.
s. i have recently become a decently neat person, and it scares the shxt out of me.
e. i supress feelings and emotions a lot more than people think. probably because evn after suppression, i'm pretty moody.
n. i want to adopt jaime and send her back to melbourne.
t. i am pretty paranoid. i got it from my mum.
t. i have an envelope opener knife thing. but i've never used it to open letters i just use it to stab things. not like. living things but. ah well.
t. i'm totally addicted to bass.
t. and any form of orange drink. red bull is good. so is ribena. alcohol tastes yucky but coles brand champagne glasses are the bomb (:
t. i have a fascination with things that are old and broken [ this does, infact, include house ]
t. i'm nothign like vaidehi. and i don't go overboard with the random facts.
(:
hope this was a good waste of time.
footnote -
these people are done-
chris
joanna
virginia
o. well, since i just mentioned it, i'm obsessed with the dark knight. i have a joker bobblehead *bobbles*
t. i can be the manliest of men if i want to be. but usually i'm just a weak little wuss.
t. i love my dog. but i'm not great at doing the whole dog pampering thing. he's a pretty dirty dog. he likes to roll in dirt.
f. i have little moments where i look in the mirror and decide i'm decently pretty. then later on i pass another mirror and feel stupid for ever thinking that.
f. my favourite thing o nthe internet is StumbleUpon. I'm an addict.
s. my parents raised me well. but sometimes i feel like i'm not allowed to do anything on my own. and i know you'll oppose me with ' but you're allowed to go to concerts, go on planes by yourself '. but i can't do simple things like go for walks. And everything i do has to be planned and i have to give notice and i have to give a good reason.
s. i'm OBSESSED with girly, happy songs. i'm hoping it's just a phase.
e. i have a pretty dirty mind, apparently.
n. i use herbal essences shampoo/conditioner. the birght pink one. straight something.
t. i like black and white photography, but i suck at it.
e. i pass time by looking at my walls. brings back random memories. you'll understand if you've seen it.
t. the idea of death doesn't scare me, as long as it's death by something cool. like death by black hole, or death by meteor, or death by getting lodged between a truck and a train that carries coal.
t. i give in to bribery.
f. i'm the most annoying person i know.
s. i try my best to buy dc's and dvd's if i'm a big enough fan.
s. i have recently become a decently neat person, and it scares the shxt out of me.
e. i supress feelings and emotions a lot more than people think. probably because evn after suppression, i'm pretty moody.
n. i want to adopt jaime and send her back to melbourne.
t. i am pretty paranoid. i got it from my mum.
t. i have an envelope opener knife thing. but i've never used it to open letters i just use it to stab things. not like. living things but. ah well.
t. i'm totally addicted to bass.
t. and any form of orange drink. red bull is good. so is ribena. alcohol tastes yucky but coles brand champagne glasses are the bomb (:
t. i have a fascination with things that are old and broken [ this does, infact, include house ]
t. i'm nothign like vaidehi. and i don't go overboard with the random facts.
(:
hope this was a good waste of time.
footnote -
these people are done-
chris
joanna
virginia
romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone
11:26 am
i'llbewaiting,allthere'slefttodoisrun.
you'llbetheprinceandi'llbetheprincess,
romeosavemei'vebeenfeelingsoalone
i keepwaitingforyoubutyounevercome
isthisinmyhead?idon'tknowwhattothink
OBSESSED with this song. I WANT the princess dress with the long trail that she wears in the video ):
some things totally aren't worth blogging about, they're just not worth my hand muscles. some things are though, like the BEST thai food in the entire worldofaustralia.
Absolute Thai
*nomnomnom*
best satay in the world. everer. ok so truth is, i've been there a billion kajillion times before, and the food was always like, yum. but for some reason this time was just a really really nice feeling. there was some singers and guitarists and stuff playing songs, and the place was packed, and my dad was like chatting with the owner, kitti [ not like hello kitty, kitti, thai name (: ] . and there was this woman who was really cool and taught me the difference between caow, caow, caow (rice) , caow and caow (white). they all sound different, like different voice tones. and then there was our decently quite waiter dude, who i dubbed Mr Smiley cause he had the most smiley smile i've ever seen and it made me smile. and i remember ALMOST the whole meal that everybody ate -
satay chicken skewers
fried rice with chicken
plain rice
baramundi pad cha
chicken sha something
some soupy thing. tom yum maybe ?
*drools*
you'llbetheprinceandi'llbetheprincess,
romeosavemei'vebeenfeelingsoalone
i keepwaitingforyoubutyounevercome
isthisinmyhead?idon'tknowwhattothink
OBSESSED with this song. I WANT the princess dress with the long trail that she wears in the video ):
some things totally aren't worth blogging about, they're just not worth my hand muscles. some things are though, like the BEST thai food in the entire worldofaustralia.
Absolute Thai
Hornsby Mall
Shop R1A, Hunter St
Hornsby NSW 2077
*nomnomnom*
best satay in the world. everer. ok so truth is, i've been there a billion kajillion times before, and the food was always like, yum. but for some reason this time was just a really really nice feeling. there was some singers and guitarists and stuff playing songs, and the place was packed, and my dad was like chatting with the owner, kitti [ not like hello kitty, kitti, thai name (: ] . and there was this woman who was really cool and taught me the difference between caow, caow, caow (rice) , caow and caow (white). they all sound different, like different voice tones. and then there was our decently quite waiter dude, who i dubbed Mr Smiley cause he had the most smiley smile i've ever seen and it made me smile. and i remember ALMOST the whole meal that everybody ate -
satay chicken skewers
fried rice with chicken
plain rice
baramundi pad cha
chicken sha something
some soupy thing. tom yum maybe ?
*drools*
happy birthday,
11:09 pm - Thursday, February 19
dear apu
i miss you so much. especially now. i know i've been a bad sister who tells you nothing, and lies about everything you ask. but recently i've decided i'd change that, which is why you've got the sudden steady flow of confessions and regrets. and i realise now, that even though i'm always going to be ten years younger than you, and i always have been, you've told me everything about you since forever.
i realised that even if i didn't realise it, i was the one you came to when you were down. and now, i need that kind of person for me, and i've had you, my whole life and i never talked to you. and now i need to, i really need to and you choose the perfect time to be thousands and thousands and thousands of kilometres away. and you're voice doesn't sound like you when we talk on the phone, and the image is fuzzy on skype and i can't hug you anymore.
seriously, you have no idea, i love you so much and you're the only person who i've always always always had that i still feel like i trust and respect. oh my, i feel like crying now. it's been more than a year since you left here and i didn't take full advantage of the three weeks i had with you in between. you're the only family i have.
i miss your tea parties, i miss your preciceness, i miss your hugs, your talks, your moments where you get really really mad at me, your sarcastic comments about my fat, i miss shopping with you, going to the beach with you, running with you, watching scrubs with you, making cakes with you, just generally every single thing you do. i miss not being able to sleep at night because you watch your tv too loud at night, i miss having to compete for hot water when we're in the two different showers at the same time, i miss your name calling, miss you trying to make me look like an actually decent looking person, i miss your encouragement and i really need some.
come back to sydney please, even just to visit. visit some more and more and more and more. and another thing is, how much you've changed the last time i saw you. and in a most excellent way. and also, i promise i don't mind at all when you boss me around, it's my duty as a slave, to do that kind of thing. i'd rather have to do everything for you than have you be that far awaaaaay. even thought you'll never ever read this,
happy twenty fourth birthday you old hag. (:
i love you.
i miss you.
- stinky.
i miss you so much. especially now. i know i've been a bad sister who tells you nothing, and lies about everything you ask. but recently i've decided i'd change that, which is why you've got the sudden steady flow of confessions and regrets. and i realise now, that even though i'm always going to be ten years younger than you, and i always have been, you've told me everything about you since forever.
i realised that even if i didn't realise it, i was the one you came to when you were down. and now, i need that kind of person for me, and i've had you, my whole life and i never talked to you. and now i need to, i really need to and you choose the perfect time to be thousands and thousands and thousands of kilometres away. and you're voice doesn't sound like you when we talk on the phone, and the image is fuzzy on skype and i can't hug you anymore.
seriously, you have no idea, i love you so much and you're the only person who i've always always always had that i still feel like i trust and respect. oh my, i feel like crying now. it's been more than a year since you left here and i didn't take full advantage of the three weeks i had with you in between. you're the only family i have.
i miss your tea parties, i miss your preciceness, i miss your hugs, your talks, your moments where you get really really mad at me, your sarcastic comments about my fat, i miss shopping with you, going to the beach with you, running with you, watching scrubs with you, making cakes with you, just generally every single thing you do. i miss not being able to sleep at night because you watch your tv too loud at night, i miss having to compete for hot water when we're in the two different showers at the same time, i miss your name calling, miss you trying to make me look like an actually decent looking person, i miss your encouragement and i really need some.
come back to sydney please, even just to visit. visit some more and more and more and more. and another thing is, how much you've changed the last time i saw you. and in a most excellent way. and also, i promise i don't mind at all when you boss me around, it's my duty as a slave, to do that kind of thing. i'd rather have to do everything for you than have you be that far awaaaaay. even thought you'll never ever read this,
happy twenty fourth birthday you old hag. (:
i love you.
i miss you.
- stinky.
dear grace,
6:17 pm - Tuesday, February 17
you, woman, are amazing, you have no idea,
how many times you've dazzled me with your feel good spirit.
you have no idea, how many times you've pulled me up from rock bottom.
we've been friends forever, and it's sad that i can't tell the story of how we became friends
because i don't remember a thing about meeting you.
just that when camp buddy picking time came, we mutually decided we were MEANT TO BE.
and i know we've been close for a long time, but i never realised how much you really matter.
i never noticed how much i love you.
and don't remember when we aquired the skill to read each others minds,
but it makes it so much easier, because even the words i can't say,
things i can't explain,
you get it anyway. and you know exactly what to do.
so a million times over, thankyou,thankyou,thankyou.
i love you (L)
-bloo.
how many times you've dazzled me with your feel good spirit.
you have no idea, how many times you've pulled me up from rock bottom.
we've been friends forever, and it's sad that i can't tell the story of how we became friends
because i don't remember a thing about meeting you.
just that when camp buddy picking time came, we mutually decided we were MEANT TO BE.
and i know we've been close for a long time, but i never realised how much you really matter.
i never noticed how much i love you.
and don't remember when we aquired the skill to read each others minds,
but it makes it so much easier, because even the words i can't say,
things i can't explain,
you get it anyway. and you know exactly what to do.
so a million times over, thankyou,thankyou,thankyou.
i love you (L)
-bloo.
this little ditty is for a love of mine,
11:10 pm - Monday, February 16
and the songs goes something like this;
a-one, a-two, a-onetwothreefour
ok, so i have no songs. or none worth sharing, my total lack of creative ability has left me to fumble anad play with my words like a child and their toy.
let's start with small talk, shall we ? i just looked up small talk topics on google and editted it to fit my boredem. here we go -
a-one, a-two, a-onetwothreefour
ok, so i have no songs. or none worth sharing, my total lack of creative ability has left me to fumble anad play with my words like a child and their toy.
let's start with small talk, shall we ? i just looked up small talk topics on google and editted it to fit my boredem. here we go -
What are some common topics that you can safely conduct small talk about? You could initiate small talk about:
1) Sports - almost everyone likes some kind of sport.
Did you watch the tennis, because i didn't. Well i watched the first five minutes of the semi-finals and cheered for the hotter guy, he lost. Then i watched a half an hour of the men's finals when i was at the eirport, sitting on a luggage trolley. I went for the hotter guy then too, i think he lost too. And cricket, all i know is that we suck right now, what the heck is happening?
2) Hobbies
I like photography and listening to music. Sounds like introducing myself at a group therapy session. "Hi my name's joyeeta and i have a problem - i'm addicted to *blank*" *applaud* because the first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one. etc etc, i think we're going off topic. if you want my photography is over THERE.
3) Weather and climate being experienced
stupid stupid weather. everthings was sunny and it was going to be perfect walking home weather, but "The clear skies were lies." - quote a great man. so just as we started walking, it started raining. but i really do miss the rain, so it didn't bother me, except i might catch a cold.
4) Your respective spouse and children. well, none, except those two. but seriosuly 'respective' spouse and children, what, they think you're accodentally start talking about the other persons wife?
5) Media - such as television shows, movies, or music that both of you may like.
tv i liked recently - House, Lie To Me, SCRUBS, Yam Roll. movies i've recently loved, Bttf, tdk, moulin rouge, the corpse bride, fight club, YESMAN, lots of others oh and i recently watched australia. i could say a lot about it. mainly it was so-so.
6) Holidays that you think the other person may enjoy (but refrain from talking about how much your holiday cost you - unless the other party brings it up.)
Summer holidays, and don't worry, they don't cost anything, sort of.
7) Your respective hometowns
Sydney, sydney, SYDNEY. lovely, horrible, lovely, great, horrible, terrible. ARGH sydney is crazy but where else on the world would i rather be other than this freakshow ? maybe dhaka city but really, that's just not going to happen anytime soon. DAMNIT, i'm missing my cousins wedding ):
8) General information about the occupation of each person.
i work as a helper at an after shcool care place where i look after and teach young kids. i get good money and don't actually have to do very much. i'm the laziest, highest earning worker of my age , that you've ever seen.
9) Current trends in art or fashion.
i'm not totally sure, what's in fashion. uhm. that flower print ? is that chekered stuff still in ? i still love it. i think i might buy that dress. wait it wasn't that cheap, no scratch that thought. art is crazy whites and contrast. awesome awesome awesome.
10) Gossip about famous people.
like zomg did u see that thing bout that dude i don't really giv a hoot about? yah oh my god i was lyk totes shocked and uncaring too, like omg! no i didn't kno be4, did yu read that article! lol look at wut they look lyk now. so old and wrinkley like ewzers.
Hopefully all these tips will allow you to have an easier time looking for a small talk topic
things that have made me smile recently
5:28 pm - Sunday, February 15
- people wearing my hat, and looking HOT .
- " watched transporter 3. shittest movie >.>some ugly orange haired millions of freckles unsexy ukraine non english speaking whore for main character-_- . just wanted to choke her." the best film review i've ever heard, courtesy grace.
- stuart mcburney
- finishing my homework mor ethan a day before it's due.
- people helping.
- red red roses.
- vaidehi receiving multiple speed dating emails.
- talking about the future.
- my camera.
- things that make a lot of sense.
- toy soldiers
- miss eakin - rorororor.
- getting high-fives from chen don.
- cornettos ftw.
- not wearing shoes.
- the fact that my mosquito bites are going away !!!
- lie to me
- drama class ~ the oile's , monkey shxt, sox and shooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssaaaaahahahaaaaa):
- mr wong and the cha cha. cha cha rock.
- not dreaming about people loosing body parts.
- vaidehi kissing joanna j's jean clad arse. sexy as hell.
- mr kaizer
(:
that's not even all of them, but that's a lot to smile about.
- " watched transporter 3. shittest movie >.>some ugly orange haired millions of freckles unsexy ukraine non english speaking whore for main character-_- . just wanted to choke her." the best film review i've ever heard, courtesy grace.
- stuart mcburney
- finishing my homework mor ethan a day before it's due.
- people helping.
- red red roses.
- vaidehi receiving multiple speed dating emails.
- talking about the future.
- my camera.
- things that make a lot of sense.
- toy soldiers
- miss eakin - rorororor.
- getting high-fives from chen don.
- cornettos ftw.
- not wearing shoes.
- the fact that my mosquito bites are going away !!!
- lie to me
- drama class ~ the oile's , monkey shxt, sox and shooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssaaaaahahahaaaaa):
- mr wong and the cha cha. cha cha rock.
- not dreaming about people loosing body parts.
- vaidehi kissing joanna j's jean clad arse. sexy as hell.
- mr kaizer
(:
that's not even all of them, but that's a lot to smile about.
time to renew, refresh.
12:43 pm
this should have most definitely been a new years post, but it's right about time we started again. i want to meet you, again. i want to know who you are, not who you want to be. start with your name, your name and again and again and again till it's etched even deeper into the back of my skull. your age. how old are you and how old do you act. how old do we all act. how old are we. where do you live. where do you call home, because trust me they're two completely different things. what music do you like. what makes you happy, what makes you sad. what do you do with your spare time, nothing, everything ? what's your nationality , where do you come from.
tell me your roots, who's made you who you are. because i am not one person, i am a million dffferent people in one. a million people's big 3D walking, talking ,thinking jigsaw puzzle. i'm almost certain this is you too. i want to get to know you, and the million other people who make you, you.
i want to know your thoughts on certain subjects. certain people, i need to know what your thinking and i need to know how you feel. and don't ever tell me ' you can't explain it' because i don't care if all you do is fumble on words, it'll help me understand. i want you to be happy. whether or not, my vision is blurred, i want you to be able to see clearly. be concise, of what you want.
baby, it's fact
our love is true
the way black is black
and blue is just blue
my love is true
it's a matter of fact
oh, and you love me too
it's as simple as that
baby, our love is true
tell me your roots, who's made you who you are. because i am not one person, i am a million dffferent people in one. a million people's big 3D walking, talking ,thinking jigsaw puzzle. i'm almost certain this is you too. i want to get to know you, and the million other people who make you, you.
i want to know your thoughts on certain subjects. certain people, i need to know what your thinking and i need to know how you feel. and don't ever tell me ' you can't explain it' because i don't care if all you do is fumble on words, it'll help me understand. i want you to be happy. whether or not, my vision is blurred, i want you to be able to see clearly. be concise, of what you want.
baby, it's fact
our love is true
the way black is black
and blue is just blue
my love is true
it's a matter of fact
oh, and you love me too
it's as simple as that
baby, our love is true
I'll follow you into the dark.
8:13 pm - Thursday, February 12
i used to be a lot stronger, i seem to have grown weak. it bothers me, more than a lot, that i'm not somebody who can be relied upon when it comes to emotional support anymore. it's probably just hormones, but it's become much easier for me to break down. ' i really need a hug right now ' moments are always, and i think i think to much. think about them, that, this, the why's , the how's , things that don't matter, things that mean the world, the whatwherewhens, even the thought about thinking in itself and why why why, do i do so much of it now. i need something. something. don't know what.
remember.
10:58 pm - Saturday, February 7
out of boredom, i'm going to recount on an occasion that i think of when i think of certain emotions. [ thanks for the emotions, kids. ] :
jealousy
in primary school, i had this best friend. we did everything together, we told each other everything. i was always at her house, she was always at mine, you know, normal little girl stuff. i was always more privileged than she was in every way. her dad left her when she was young, she lived in a dodgy apartment next to some druggie, she drove a little car which was like 1398613986315 years old. everything of mine was bigger in quantity, better in quality and even then i was so, so jealous of her.
i was jealous of every aspect of her. everybody loved her, especially parents and teachers. she didn't have a lot of gadgets and gizmos but she had little trinkets and toys that i loved so much. i used to be quietly fascinated everytime i walked into her room. and she was so neat. all my stuff was carelessly strewn around my room but hers was so perfectly kept, like everything was a treasure. i wanted to be like that.
and her apartment was so magical to me it was like another land. we made a cubby house thing through this passage near the side of the garage. there were loose fences that we'd climb through, and we'd steal stones from the next apartment to help build our castle. around the other side of the apartment block was an abandoned toilet thing, she'd tell me how the rumour was, there was a zombie man living in there, and it was OUR job to get rid of him! and we'd mi crazy formula's of tree dew and rain water and drop it inside the door, then screech and run away. we'd slide down the railings of the apartment, we'd hand skipping rops from the second floor and play tarzan. it was the perfect childhood.
funny thing was, she was eternally jealous of me too. so when she cam to my house, she'd play with all my gadgets. she'd force us to sit and play computer games that she didn't have. take advantage of my 'fast' internet and be amazed at how 'cool' it was that i could just dump things on the floor. truth is i couldn't, i just couldn't be bothered.
i still want to be like her.
ecstatic
the first thing that springs into mind when i think of ecstacy is the drug. and then i laugh. but then i remember, that has nothing to do with me and my life so the second thing that springs to mind is panic at the disco. i know, i know, 'omg FANGIRL' but yeah, i kind of am. but anyway. i think the 16th August 2008 was the best day of my life. so far. as some of you may know, that's my birthday, and of course that was already a great day. my mum had given me panic at the disco tickets for my birthday since they were playing on the 22nd.
i went to check my emails, expecting the usual flow of wellwishings from cousins and friends. in amongst them i found an email from northern downpour - the panic fansite *grin* i opened i and jumped out of my seat. EARLY ENTRY! this meant i could get into the show a half an hour before the general public, and obtain front row mosh positioning. this was MAJOR. this was panic at the disco UPCLOSE. i could be SO close to them, i could SEE pimples.
after my little happy dance, i went on checking my emails. i saw ANOTHER northern downpour email. i thought maybe they'd doubled up or something and i clicked the email. i SCREAMED. i had just been informed that i was going to have a MEET AND GREET with MY FAVOURITE BAND. ok so, their music isn't my favourite, not really, never was. but THEY are my favourite band. it's like the difference between love and infatuation, i was INFATUATED with panic at the disco, and I, JOYEETA *mumbleslastname* was GOING TO MEET PANIC AT THE DISCO, IN PERSON. this is like TOUCHABLE DISTANCE. this is like, this is like. it's like meeting your idols. seriosuly. FOUR of them. and i got to get something SIGNED. authentically signed, signed in front of me.
and so the day came, and i brought along joanna and we waited patiently in the meet and greet line. we took some photos as we waited. and eventually. their infamous bodygaurd, zac, came around the corner. i became estatic and i waved like a maniac. he mocked me and waved like a maniac back. great first impression jo, now he'll never love you. hahahaha. but anyway, i'm not usually good with first impressions. so he led us into the room, 100 or so people, in a tiny tiny tiny rehearsal-like room thing. everyone was excited and anxious. some people were crying, and that scared me a little. but the moment finally came, and from behind me, four men i'd only ever seen on computer screen, tv pixels and magazine posters were suddenly there, smiling and waving and a 100 girls flailed. they were as nice as i'd hoped they'd be. at the signing table, i conversed with jon about his love of caramel and how he preffered it over most other things. the topic was brought up over the fact that my chosen fan gift was 4 karemello koalas. after that , i had a sudden pang of exxagurated respect for these guys. they go through this endless line of fangirls every show. but they keep smiling, they're just so, nice. or at least, they put on a good mask, because i know if i was one of them, i might just be sick of it all now. every girl, wanting to be noticed, wanting to me remembered, at least. and afterwardsm they posed with us for a picture. they were polite, [ he even put his arm around me *squeel* erm *regains dignity* ] and tolerant. so many photos they've had to take with fans everyday. then press photos, phtooshoots, random crazy candids. but anyway. that was it, that was, ecstacy for me.
anger
to be completed when more bored.
happy
to be completed when more bored.
jealousy
in primary school, i had this best friend. we did everything together, we told each other everything. i was always at her house, she was always at mine, you know, normal little girl stuff. i was always more privileged than she was in every way. her dad left her when she was young, she lived in a dodgy apartment next to some druggie, she drove a little car which was like 1398613986315 years old. everything of mine was bigger in quantity, better in quality and even then i was so, so jealous of her.
i was jealous of every aspect of her. everybody loved her, especially parents and teachers. she didn't have a lot of gadgets and gizmos but she had little trinkets and toys that i loved so much. i used to be quietly fascinated everytime i walked into her room. and she was so neat. all my stuff was carelessly strewn around my room but hers was so perfectly kept, like everything was a treasure. i wanted to be like that.
and her apartment was so magical to me it was like another land. we made a cubby house thing through this passage near the side of the garage. there were loose fences that we'd climb through, and we'd steal stones from the next apartment to help build our castle. around the other side of the apartment block was an abandoned toilet thing, she'd tell me how the rumour was, there was a zombie man living in there, and it was OUR job to get rid of him! and we'd mi crazy formula's of tree dew and rain water and drop it inside the door, then screech and run away. we'd slide down the railings of the apartment, we'd hand skipping rops from the second floor and play tarzan. it was the perfect childhood.
funny thing was, she was eternally jealous of me too. so when she cam to my house, she'd play with all my gadgets. she'd force us to sit and play computer games that she didn't have. take advantage of my 'fast' internet and be amazed at how 'cool' it was that i could just dump things on the floor. truth is i couldn't, i just couldn't be bothered.
i still want to be like her.
ecstatic
the first thing that springs into mind when i think of ecstacy is the drug. and then i laugh. but then i remember, that has nothing to do with me and my life so the second thing that springs to mind is panic at the disco. i know, i know, 'omg FANGIRL' but yeah, i kind of am. but anyway. i think the 16th August 2008 was the best day of my life. so far. as some of you may know, that's my birthday, and of course that was already a great day. my mum had given me panic at the disco tickets for my birthday since they were playing on the 22nd.
i went to check my emails, expecting the usual flow of wellwishings from cousins and friends. in amongst them i found an email from northern downpour - the panic fansite *grin* i opened i and jumped out of my seat. EARLY ENTRY! this meant i could get into the show a half an hour before the general public, and obtain front row mosh positioning. this was MAJOR. this was panic at the disco UPCLOSE. i could be SO close to them, i could SEE pimples.
after my little happy dance, i went on checking my emails. i saw ANOTHER northern downpour email. i thought maybe they'd doubled up or something and i clicked the email. i SCREAMED. i had just been informed that i was going to have a MEET AND GREET with MY FAVOURITE BAND. ok so, their music isn't my favourite, not really, never was. but THEY are my favourite band. it's like the difference between love and infatuation, i was INFATUATED with panic at the disco, and I, JOYEETA *mumbleslastname* was GOING TO MEET PANIC AT THE DISCO, IN PERSON. this is like TOUCHABLE DISTANCE. this is like, this is like. it's like meeting your idols. seriosuly. FOUR of them. and i got to get something SIGNED. authentically signed, signed in front of me.
and so the day came, and i brought along joanna and we waited patiently in the meet and greet line. we took some photos as we waited. and eventually. their infamous bodygaurd, zac, came around the corner. i became estatic and i waved like a maniac. he mocked me and waved like a maniac back. great first impression jo, now he'll never love you. hahahaha. but anyway, i'm not usually good with first impressions. so he led us into the room, 100 or so people, in a tiny tiny tiny rehearsal-like room thing. everyone was excited and anxious. some people were crying, and that scared me a little. but the moment finally came, and from behind me, four men i'd only ever seen on computer screen, tv pixels and magazine posters were suddenly there, smiling and waving and a 100 girls flailed. they were as nice as i'd hoped they'd be. at the signing table, i conversed with jon about his love of caramel and how he preffered it over most other things. the topic was brought up over the fact that my chosen fan gift was 4 karemello koalas. after that , i had a sudden pang of exxagurated respect for these guys. they go through this endless line of fangirls every show. but they keep smiling, they're just so, nice. or at least, they put on a good mask, because i know if i was one of them, i might just be sick of it all now. every girl, wanting to be noticed, wanting to me remembered, at least. and afterwardsm they posed with us for a picture. they were polite, [ he even put his arm around me *squeel* erm *regains dignity* ] and tolerant. so many photos they've had to take with fans everyday. then press photos, phtooshoots, random crazy candids. but anyway. that was it, that was, ecstacy for me.
anger
to be completed when more bored.
happy
to be completed when more bored.
i don't know why you're orange, but i'm concerned for your health.
9:20 pm
and if you were purple, you'd be a nice colour
but healthwise, that'd suck pretty hard, too.
yellow seems quite common,
so i don't see it as a issue.
green could be an problem,
stop eating mouldy things and you'll be fine.
white, white, pale
hot soup, cold ice packs, in bed by nine.
bright red, like beetroot pink,
you're in need of a drink or a splash.
if you weren't there, a shade of invisible,
i wouldn't be able to see you, and into you i'd crash.
but really you can be any colour you choose,
just don't be blue,
because blue doesn't suit you.
results of boredom. concern for the society. i'm bored. generally happy though. but yeah, bored.
but healthwise, that'd suck pretty hard, too.
yellow seems quite common,
so i don't see it as a issue.
green could be an problem,
stop eating mouldy things and you'll be fine.
white, white, pale
hot soup, cold ice packs, in bed by nine.
bright red, like beetroot pink,
you're in need of a drink or a splash.
if you weren't there, a shade of invisible,
i wouldn't be able to see you, and into you i'd crash.
but really you can be any colour you choose,
just don't be blue,
because blue doesn't suit you.
results of boredom. concern for the society. i'm bored. generally happy though. but yeah, bored.
funnnnnnn,
7:03 pm - Friday, February 6
this is.
so.
cool.
http://www.wordle.net/
i just used all the words from my blog since i started it. came out well.
slipped my mind.
8:55 pm - Tuesday, February 3
i didn't know,
that you had the ability to make me cry.
but i forgot,
how much you mean to me.
sorry for everything.
edit :
and again.
and sorry.
again.
that you had the ability to make me cry.
but i forgot,
how much you mean to me.
sorry for everything.
edit :
and again.
and sorry.
again.
A R C H I V E S
this is how i waste my life
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
November 2009
January 2010
March 2010
May 2011
October 2012
F R I E N D L I E S
i am not anti-social.
forevermylove
theonewhomakesmesmile
lalalieloveyou
heyjude
totalspaz
oliver
natalie
thebabe
twitterME